We are starting off a whole new week today, and I am yearning for some normalcy. The amount of stress, joy, sadness, exhaustion, etc that has been apart of our lives the past 6 days has been enormous. I have hit the wall, and am praying for normalcy. At least a few days of it. Is that asking too much? ;)
People have asked how I am doing, and how Matthew is doing. This is what I say...for every bit of anger and fear that I have felt, I feel more love, comfort, and peace. I mean this from the bottom of my heart. I have never felt God's presence so near to me. It is almost like I can physically feel His arms on my shoulders. I have felt a blanket covering up my nerves. I can even sense that the peace and comfort I am feeling are not natural. This unnatural peace has allowed me to be home by myself, and even enter the house alone at night with no fear.
As real and concrete a thinker as I am, I must share that when the attack is going through my mind, I never picture it without two angels (the angels in revelation/not fat babies playing harps) right behind Matthew in full attack mode. I couldn't believe how real these visions were, and then it occurred to me that perhaps God placed those images in my head to let me know what really happened. After all, there are passages in the bible that reference angels protecting children.
Something that keeps running through my mind, is that our God is the God of comfort. I believe with all my heart that God hurt for our entire family when we saw our sweet boy with blood all over his face, shaking, talking to the policemen. I believe that He uses his church to show His comfort. I have been completely and utterly blown away by the kindness of friends and loved ones. Every message sent, kind word said, and kind deed has helped heal my heart. All of this kindness and compassion keeps running through my mind. I see your faces in my mind and I will never forget what you have done. I won't mention them by name, but you know who you are. I love you dearly.
Matthew is doing remarkably well. If you don't know him personally, I will tell you that people who do know him are not at all shocked at how he handled everything. Matthew has always had the heart of a warrior. You can see it so clearly when he is playing sports. If he were full blooded Scottish, rather than 1/2 Scottish, he would be running around with blue paint on his face screaming, "Freedom!":) His main reaction to this is just pride that he defended our home.
My dear friend, Ashlie, sent me this verse from Proverbs 28:1. "The wicked man runs though he is not provoked, but a righteous man is as bold as a lion". Matthew adores this verse, and I pray that he lives up to this verse his entire life.
Now, about his attacker. I tend to lean more toward hanging up criminals by their toes and whipping them. Not tons of mercy on my part. However, I find myself praying for Matthew's attacker. I have no doubt that his original intent was not to hurt Matthew. Just get him out of the way to gain entry to our house. Many friends have pointed out that he must not have been expecting the Home Alone boy! I am also relatively convinced that he was on drugs at the time of the attempted break in, and looking for drug money. No other reason can explain his rash and brazen action. I pray that when this man sobered up, he realized that he hurt a child, and maybe this was what he needed to turn his life around. I realize that that would take a miracle, but we are all about miracles this week.
Before this entire ordeal occurred, Matthew had expressed a deep desire to be baptized. It was decided on Tuesday night that this Sunday would be the day that he would become a Christian. When Matthew was asked how he wanted things to go on Sunday, he stated that he wanted Daddy to baptize him, Uncle Michael to take his confession, Deedah to pray for him, and Uncle Josh and Thomas to stand with him. It was a moment I will never forget. Seeing my beautiful boy standing with such Godly men. I feel tremendously blessed that my sons will grown up with incredible mentors. What a way to end the week.
So this is where we are. Taking things one day at a time, and slowly returning to our new normal.
In case you missed hearing of our saga, here was what was posted on Facebook last week:
Facebook entry: 11/11/09
I hesitated to write a note about what happened today, but there are lots of sweet concerned friends who care for Matthew, our 10 year old son, as well as some rumors floating around, so I thought I would clarify:
At 4:00, I needed to run a quick errand. I sent the little two kids to their friends house, and Matthew asked to stay home to practice his piano before his lesson in an hour. After I finished my errand, about 15 minutes later, I realized that I had left my cell phone in the car. I had 5 missed calls from the house. Figuring that Matthew wanted to know if he could watch TV, I called the house and my sister answered. She told me that Matthew had been attacked by a man in a ski mask. He tried to call me, and then called my sister to see if he needed to call 911. Of course, I raced home to find several police cars in front of my house, and my precious 10 year old boy talking to them with a bloody face.
Apparently, after practicing piano for a few minutes, he decided to surprise me by taking out the trash. When he opened the garage door, a tall man in a ski mask was standing there and demanded that Matthew give him our money and jewelry. Matthew said no and started screaming. The man proceeded to punch Matthew hard in the face twice. Then the man started running inside our house, and Matthew tripped him, then stepped on him telling him that he was NOT going to go into his house. The man called Matthew every name in the book and wound up punching him in the face one more time before running away.
Matthew was able to tell this story to the police without crying once. The police officers couldn't believe how brave he was and were shocked at Matthew's presence of mind. He was able to tell the policemen that his attacker was tall like his Uncle Michael, white (he could see only under his eyes), and left handed, since he punched with his left hand.
After seeing his bloody face, we all agreed that a trip to the E.R. was in order to make sure his bones were in tact. A sweet doctor who lives a few houses down from me called into the E.R. to make sure we were treated well. And we were. We didn't have to even wait in the waiting room. Dr. H is the best. After the doctor checked him out, he thought that a cat scan would be best, and, praise God, no bones were broken. Just a very bloody nose and possibly two black eyes tomorrow.
I am feeling many emotions right now. I have never been prouder of my son. That boy is the bravest person I know. I still cannot fathom the sight of a man in a ski mask waiting by the door. I am scared that somehow this jerk is going to try to come back to our house, and I feel like it will be a long time before I let any of them out of my sight. But mostly, I am praising God for keeping my son safe. While the police officers commended Matthew's bravery, they were quick to point out that had this man had a knife or gun, this wouldn't have ended the same way.
Please keep our family in your thoughts and prayers. I just want Matthew's mental health to be OK. He is a remarkable boy, and I know he will heal, but hope that the healing process is quick.
Thank you for your concern. If you live in our neighborhood, keep an eye out. I think it is a good reminder to everyone in a safe neighborhood to keep garage doors and every door in your house locked. It might also help to have a body guard like my Matthew.
Facebook entry: 11/12/09
I wanted to follow up with last night's note, and this will be the last that I write about this incident. We are moving forward, trusting that God has a purpose for Matthew, and taking comfort in the peace that only He can give.
First of all, I am completely overwhelmed by the kindness and concern from our friends and family. I have heard people say before that they can feel people's prayers. I don't think I fully grasped that concept until this happened. I tend to not sleep well when I am upset. I actually did not sleep well the night before this, after the death of my sweet, elderly friend, Millie. So, I was anticipating a rough night. Our entire family slept like babies last night. This morning, I read some of your sweet emails and heard you say over the phone that you specifically prayed that we would sleep well. I am so grateful for that. Also, I am feeling an almost unnatural sense of peace about this. When I want to start playing the "what ifs" in my head, I am able to stop myself and remind myself that the what ifs didn't happen. God had his hand on Matthew.
My brother brought something to my attention today. I am actually grateful that Matthew did go outside when he did. It is obvious that this man was going to break into our house, and I shutter to think about what he would have done to him if he had had the protection of the house. The man, I think, ran away knowing that someone would see him any minute. But there I go with the what ifs...
I have been concerned about Matthew's emotional health, and so far, he is handling this remarkably well. When I ask him how he is feeling, he simply says that he is proud he protected our home and happy that God was with him. He is actually able to laugh about it. Bryon and the boys love to wrestle, and the occasional, "Your Kung-Fu...is not that good." will slip out of their mouths. When Matthew and I were talking today, he said, "Apparently, my Kung Fu is that good!"
I want to respond to everyone's emails, but if I don't, please know that every word you have said has comforted me. I am blown away. We even had the Chick Fil A cow come to our house today and bring us lunch in recognition of Matthew's bravery! Thanks, Kristin!
So, after today, we are going to go back to normal, with a few exceptions. We will be much more diligent about locking every door and shutting the garage door when we are home. I try to be on top of this, but when kids are walking out of every door in our home, it get's tough to control. I recognize none of this would have helped in the situation, but still,it is a good reminder to all of us lulled into thinking we live in a safe neighborhood. Also, for a while at least, until I feel comfortable, my children will not be playing outside without me present. Other than the physical punches to Matthew's face, this hurts the worst. This really makes me angry, that one idiot could freak out an entire neighborhood of sweet families. But, I am reminded, that we live in a broken world, and have to rely on God.
There is part of me that is drowning in mommy guilt. I should have been there. We started this summer leaving Matthew at home for short stints, usually around 30 minutes at a time. He hasn't let us down once. Everyone who knows him knows that he is extremely responsible and trustworthy. Even as horrendous as this experience was, he handled himself better than I could have ever hoped. In my heart, I am saying that I am going to keep him on one of those kid leashes until he is 16, but the truth is, even through all of this, I know he can handle himself. When he is ready, I am sure we will go back to letting him stay home while I run a quick errand.
I think that's about it. I love you all, and are thankful you are in our lives!
We spent the weekend getting our house decorated, and only have one project left to do. I love having the house decorated! We had a wonderful weekend together, then it was off to school and work yesterday. I was sad saying goodbye to the family, but so excited about my day yesterday! 
